{"id":5002,"date":"2010-04-26T22:38:25","date_gmt":"2010-04-27T05:38:25","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/juliashih.com\/?p=5002"},"modified":"2010-04-27T01:08:35","modified_gmt":"2010-04-27T08:08:35","slug":"5002","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/juliashih.com\/?p=5002","title":{"rendered":""},"content":{"rendered":"<p><strong>status of the zoo:<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>the panther got loose. i&#8217;m pretty sure she either fucked or ate something. no one knows which because we were all too afraid to follow her.<\/p>\n<p>the monkeys formed a union and have &#8220;quit,&#8221; whatever that means. like fine then. where&#8217;re you gonna go? how do you quit a zoo?<\/p>\n<p>the birds, all of them, are constipated; they seem really confused by the last batch of erratic weather<\/p>\n<p>and the penguins have learned how to use computers.<\/p>\n<p>perhaps that last point was the one i should have led with.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>status of the zoo: the panther got loose. i&#8217;m pretty sure she either fucked or ate something. no one knows which because we were all too afraid to follow her. the monkeys formed a union and have &#8220;quit,&#8221; whatever that means. like fine then. where&#8217;re you gonna go? how do you quit a zoo? the [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_exactmetrics_skip_tracking":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_active":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_note":"","_exactmetrics_sitenote_category":0,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-5002","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/sbl5mn-5002","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/juliashih.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5002","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/juliashih.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/juliashih.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/juliashih.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/juliashih.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=5002"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/juliashih.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5002\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":5018,"href":"https:\/\/juliashih.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5002\/revisions\/5018"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/juliashih.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=5002"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/juliashih.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=5002"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/juliashih.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=5002"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}