FEARFUL THOUGHT OF THE MORNING: IS LOVE A FARCE?
I went to the chiropractor once and he explained to me the phenomenon of tickling. Being tickled is actually an extremely uncomfortable experience that raises anxiety in a human being, but the brain doesn’t quite know how to classify the signals it creates. It recognizes that the signals it receives don’t exactly fit into the “pain,” category so it assigns a very ambivalent “pleasure” even though instinctually, when a person is tickled, her instinctual body responses are to get away from the stimuli.
I wonder if being in love is a similar phenomenon. Because, as I’ve realized, to truly love is to be selfless. You have no control when you’re in love. You’re just completely open and you’ll give the other person anything. But is anyone really happy that way? Because that’s what love is, and if you truly know what it means to love, then you will know what it means to give without necessarily receiving back. I think the people who are actually happy are those who love half-assed. They think they love, but really, they maintain some control and are monitoring what they receive back. They don’t completely give of themselves, and therefore, they have everything to gain and not much to lose. I think we’ve all been led to believe that love is bliss, but love is actually somewhat uncomfortable. But we strive for it, and want it so badly when in truth, I don’t think anyone who gives 100% is truly happy. They’re just saints.
So in truth, maybe love is like being tickled. We attach it to feelings of joy when in fact, it doesn’t exactly make us very comfortable or happy. Maybe we should all stick with infatuation and pretend love. It’s a lot safer and a happier experience.