cities are alike in some ways. blue skies, gray skies, black skies. through dark and light. doesn’t matter if it’s made by man or beast, everything’s bigger than you. just the people around you happen to be the same size.
my earliest understanding came from watching an army of ants eat a peach that had fallen under a tree. it didn’t matter what was happening in the world around me. They formed a line and took away every single usable piece of that peach. you can scatter them, scare them shitless. they aren’t idiots. they would hide, wait out the threat and form their line again. one lesson that stuck with me for life–they always came back for their dead. it didn’t matter how many they lose trying to get that body. they always come back to carry them away.
whenever i think about god, i think about those ants. whatever their understanding of me was, as a force of nature, as a force of evil, as a force of random happening, they coped and pushed forward, always coming back for their dead. to an extent, i had the power to decide their fate.
to some people, every person has great power. to some universe, everyone is a god.
so if i am a god to a world so small, then where in the world is the god of me? and i tried to look for the biggest things i could find.
and some nights, looking out, i encounter something so big the sky opens up, peeled back like a dollhouse rooftop to reveal another world. And wherever it was i thought i was in that moment, i find myself in my bedroom, waking from a dream.