Name: Michael
Age: 20
Sign: Pisces
Hobbies: Airplanes, etc.
Favorite Food: Chinese
Favorite Color: Red, Blue and Green
Why? They make me happy.
What is your idea of the perfect girl? Someone who is nice and who is not like my mom, who is easy to be upset. Someone well-tempered.
Any other qualities? Has to be a Pisces or Gemini. I don’t care how old the girl is. If it’s 20, if it’s 23, it doesn’t matter.
What about 55? That is too old.
Where do you see yourself in 10 years? Probably dead.
Michael. Okay. In 10 years, I will probably be at a permanent job.
What kind of job? Like working at The New Orient, full-time, not part-time.
You want to be a waiter full-time? Yes.
I thought you wanted to be a mechanic. Yes. A mechanic full-time.
What do you think are your best qualities to offer a girl? I would say, a good temper, that I drink a lot of liquids when it’s hot, and that I also watch what I eat and I watch my weight.
What do people like most about you? That I laugh a lot.
Do you consider yourself handsome? Yes, because I do my hair every day, I always spike it up, and I always keep my shirts ironed and neat.
What do you think is your best physical feature? I would say my eyes, because I don’t blink that much.
If you dated a girl, what would you do together? Probably not watch Blondie* cuz she’s old. Probably go to the movies, have doughnuts once in a while, go out to dinner.
[Michael is obsessed with the band, Blondie]
What other questions should I ask? Like, ‘Do you have anything in mind right now?’
Okay. Do you have anything in mind right now? No I don’t.
Who are your heroes? The people from 9/11. And the guy from Superman. Because he is always saving people.
Do you think you always save people? Yes. One time you were scared of a spider, so I ran over to kill it. That’s called brave, because boys are usually scared too.
Would you like to have kids someday? Yes, but they have to be not that naughty. Not breaking stuff.
Why? Because they may break something valuable. And if they break it, they are going to have to pay for it. They have to take responsibility.
What would you like to say to all those girls out there? I would like to say that I love you. I love you and I wish one of you guys could be my girlfriend.
And there you have it. Qualified applicants, please submit all inquiries to me. But understand that I’m a protective bitch because my little brother is my heart and soul and angel.