Brian is out of town tonight but no anonymous sex for me. I’m on hour 11am-12pm of 24 (Season 1). I’ve been watching those dvds for DAYS and I’m not even halfway through.

I’m reading Bridget Jones’s Diary. It’s really funny. I was actually reading it at Starbuck’s last night, but was so tired, I kept falling asleep. But then whenever a customer would laugh or say something loudly at the counter, I would suddenly looking up at them, really alertly and wide-eyed like I was intrigued by their conversation, trying to pretend I wasn’t asleep. The same way you do at school (or, um…work) when you’re trying to look up enough or shift around enough to look like you’re awake and reading so you don’t get into trouble. But every time I did that, I would remember that no one gives a fuck if I’m asleep because I’m not in school (or, um…work). But the funny thing was that the guy sitting next to me must have thought I was awake because every time I looked up, he would try to engage me in conversation. And I would just stare at him blankly because my brain was still asleep. This little program was just what my body has been trained to do, since I’m a pro at falling asleep in places without getting caught.

In other news, my brother has apparently bought a car on Ebay. My mom noticed a paypal charge of $1000 on her credit card last week and mentioned it to me when she picked me up from the airport. I told her that paypal is like a wire transfer and we figured out that it must have been Michael. We questioned him and he said he bought a Mercedes on Ebay. We were like, “A toy or a real car?” A real car, he says. Holy fuck.

I told my mom to prosecute my brother for fraud. Just to scare him. Because he’s got all of our credit card numbers memorized and he’s always using them to buy random things on the internet.

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