We stayed in a beach villa over the water in Bora Bora. Every morning, I would go out to the deck and jump into the bluest ocean.
I had a couple of dreams.
In one, I was at a movie theater and it turned out Jennifer Aniston and Justin Theroux were in the same row. Jennifer was both making a big deal of not wanting to be noticed, but she was drawing a lot of attention that it made me wonder why she worked at cross-purposes. Justin was wearing a rubber diaper like it was a big joke, and I felt a connection to him when I asked to take a picture with him and I shook his hand. He was a cool guy, I totally wanted to get to know him, but they were going out of their way to draw a lot of attention to themselves while claiming they didn’t want attention.
In another quieter dream, Jerry and I were talking quietly about something while sitting in a stairwell, and at one point, there was a pause, where I could tell he knew how I felt, and there was almost an acknowledging moment, where it was right there between us. For the first time in a dream, it almost happened, where it was so clear he was open to me. I was frozen and I knew it could go either way, but the moment passed. Later, I was with my mom who’d seen the moment. She said, almost sadly, “Jerry really likes you.”
I had a dream about Dave on the plane. I don’t know what it is about him that irritates me so much. He was emailing with me again, being intellectually flirty, and somehow he came to hang out. Except I hung out at some wasteland rest stop like in Bagdad Cafe that was dusty on the outside and a hookah lounge on the inside. We ate some chicken-not chicken and watched foreign soap operas on a shitty little TV. I could feel how intently he wanted me to be into him, such a needy fucker. Some guy I knew came in wanting to snort marjoram, and I was being big-sisterly by telling him this shit wasn’t good for him, while cutting it up finer for him knowing he was determined to snort it. Dave left and at some point I was banging on some dirty piece of metal that came from the sewer or something, trying to fix it and waiting for contact from him. As I woke up, I said to myself, see…that’s what happens when you wait around for a guy like him…you get your hands dirty. I woke up irritated. I don’t even want that guy close to me in a dream.