Lost in Translation

I watched Troy last night and I have to ask, who decided that when doing a period piece set wherever, all of the actors must speak with an English accent? Almost everyone in the movie chose to use an English accent to authenticate the movie, even despite the fact that they were supposed to be Greeks. And then along comes Eric Bana playing Hector of Troy who says, “Well if we get to choose our own accent, I’m going to speak with my native Australian affectations.” So he spends the movie sounding like an Australian while everyone else was English. If I were in the movie, I would bring an Indian accent. Just to really mix it up.

On the subject of languages, Colin RSVP’d to my evite for my birthday party, then RSVP’d again after translating his original RSVP comments from English to Spanish to English to German to English. The results:

(Original)

Martin may be out of town, but that just means more spanking left for your tight buns. The tightest, juiciest buns in Taiwan I would reckon. I think junkster91 said it best: “man up” Shih, and get ready to beg for mercy. Or beg for more…

(After a game of Multi-Lingual Telephone)

Martin is outside city, but this means more whips for her firm rolls. The tight, more substantially of Taiwan,as if it would count. I think junkster91 of this is better:”it serves over” as Shih, prepared for grace, to ask in the situation. Or requires more… Prepare thine tight rolls!

I burst blood vessels in my head from laughing.

So I thought I would translate one of my posts a la CornishColin. I took an excerpt of my foot massage post. You can read the original below. The translation from English to Spanish to English:

Obtained blocked outside this house. Directed under the street towards a massage of the foot. According to reflexology Chinese, a vigorous one (read: ) the painful massage of the foot improves other corporal functions. For $6 more, a massage of the shoulder was offered. It rubbed my shoulders like 3 times before spending the 20 minutesnext in my end, internal thighs and… Reggie called and asked him how many massages of the shoulder implyareas near Donde-$$$-$$$-MALO-HOMBRE-TOCAR-USTED the areas. He laughed. Perhaps in Taiwan, the shoulders of a person are in an extremely diverse area ofbody.

Massage of the foot: $30.
Massage of the shoulder: $6.
Obtaining bothered by a toothless middle-aged Chinese man:

We went to this Russian bakery for drinks after the supper. They have this unit of the refridgerator that becomes a “barof the ice,”with the ice that covers the shelves, floor and sweeps, finish with snowman miniature of the ice. There were hundreds of vodkas to choose of. We chose two of Russia, including that it was test 160. I will never ingest any thing that is test 160 unless it istrying officially to kill to me. My stomach still burned one more average-hour ahead, and combined with the fact that there is smoking total within bars inTaiwan, I had to call it late early due to desire to put my headin a dressing table.It went to house, Called Reggie. It had called my time in the morning, then drunk marked him again in 1am. He was strange because in its end, it had received a call of me takes at night and thenfollowing day. How many drunk dials want you always receive in 10amWednesday, I asked to him. Esperanzadamente, not that many, unless somebody is trying to promulgate again scenes wereto leave Fertile valleys.

And then worse, a smaller excerpt of my words going back to English to Dutch to English:

Massage of the foot: $30.Massage of the shoulder: $6.To obtain impeded by tandenloze Chinese people on middleage: We went to this Russian bakery for spirits after the supper. They have this entity of refridgerator which a bar becomesof the ice, floor and range, finite with snowman miniature of the ice. There were hundreds choose vodka of. We chose two of Russia, including that was tests 160. I never no matter which thing take that tests 160 is unless itisofficially trying to me kill. My flatulence burned still one more gemiddeld-uur ahead, I had it been appropriate let early clamours wish my put headin dressing itself list.

Wait, wait, WAIT! “Flatulence!” I don’t remember talking about that!

And then suddenly, thinking about flatulence naturally led me to thoughts of…Bon Jovi. What would happen if I took revered songs by Bon Jovi and put them through the language ringer?

Let’s see.

I took the Bon Jovi song that most sounded like flatulence (You Give Love a Bad Name), and translated it from English to German back to English, then to Japanese back to English. Here are the results:

(Original)

An angel’s smile is what you sell
You promise me heaven, then put me through hell
Chains of love got a hold on me
When passion’s a prison, you can’t break free
You’re a loaded gun
There’s nowhere to run
No one can save me
The damage is done

Chorus:
Shot through the heart
And you’re to blame
You give love a bad name
I play my part and you play your game
You give love a bad name
You give love a bad name

Paint your smile on your lips
Blood red nails on your fingertips
A school boy’s dream, you act so shy
Your very first kiss was your first kiss goodbye
You’re a loaded gun
There’s nowhere to run
No one can save me
The damage is done

(Translated)

It is shot by the center
And acre of responsibility
Those give the ton love of name of the bathroom of A
I bear my role, do your play
Those give the ton love of name of the bathroom of A
Those give the ton love of name of the bathroom of A

Paint your smile of your lip
Speak the nail of the blood of the point of your finger
Dream of the pupil of A,
those operate so bashfulness
Kiss of the kiss your roofridge of all roofridge way if
Those of acre stacked the load in the rifle
That does the flexible ton of emergency of operation anywhere
Who can my pure curtain
The damage happened

Again, an occurence of things which happen in the bathroom. Seems that whenever other languages have trouble translating us, it assumes its something potty.