Oh Katie!!


Excerpt from Hot Gossip in the Entertainment section of MSN today:

The PDA- and PR-loving pair shook off the chill on Friday, when they landed in Miami to spend some time with Will Smith and Jada Pinkett Smith, who costarred with Cruise in “Collateral.”

Once again, People has all the details, reporting that the foursome enjoyed dinner together Friday night before hitting a South Beach hotspot, where they hung out into the wee hours as Holmes “kept her arms around” Cruise and hugged him from behind as they exited (a patented and much-photographed move we like to call the “rear Katie”).

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The Rear Katie: When you pay a woman $5million+ over 5 years and artificially inseminate her in the name of martians-fearing pseudo-religion in a desperate attempt to mask your flagrant homosexuality, then have her cling to you like a PR-oozing backpack in public for gratuitous photo ops.

Not to be confused with:

The Rusty Trombone: The act of performing anal cunnilingus while reaching up above the testicles to manually administer quick up and down motions to the penile shaft, resulting in a violent yet pleasant explosion.

I’ve been tossing and turning for 8 nights straight. There’s something in the peripheral of my mind that I can’t quite convince to materialize…some memory…some taste of the past…I’ve been pretending not to be watching it in hopes it’ll step out of the shadows…but it just glides seamlessly around the edges…old songs on the radio just flare up that itch. Why are we born into a web of logic that doesn’t allow us to see our accumulated pasts? I bet it’s something simple, like the abrupt smell of an infant morning in some distant life when I woke up to find that for a one ephemeral second, everything suddenly made sense.


After finishing a nice Toni Kukoc inbound alley-oop, Bucks forward Andrew Bogut got help celebrating his winning shot from Jermaine Jackson, left, Mo Williams and Jiri Welsch. The Bucks beat the Spurs, 109-107, in overtime.

Did anyone see this game? Bogut was AWESOME. He also had a flop under the basket that gave Duncan a phantom foul that was worthy of a Ginobili.