i thought gays in space was the highlight of the evening. i’m proud david and i created it.

what if jesus really were a rockstar. but he had a serious coke and sex addiction.

i wish i were psychic enough to know which of my coworkers are secretly sleeping together.

on the other hand, i like catching fish but i refuse to be responsible for killing them.

snakes are sensual creatures. i don’t want to own one or have one in my house, but i do love touching them and having them across my skin.