Echo

At a mountain-top winery watching Blondie with Mikey.
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It’s interesting that the first night you sleep in your home is when you’ve officially moved in. It’s like how the first time you sleep with someone marks the beginning of an official relationship. Sometimes.

My plant is gonna be Plant 51
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First night in new home.

There was great argument about the right time and day for me to move in. Chinese superstition rears its head. I just wanted to be in by Sunday. Threw a hissy fit and people leave me alone. I decided to have the movers come out on Sunday and sleep there on Monday.

That Saturday, hang out for the first time with two boys named Ham and Tam. Tam gives me a candle. Ham tells me its the first night you sleep at a place that you’ve really moved in.
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How the hell did I manage to not learn astronomy.
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Julia has found a home amongst right angles.
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The gemini core lies in two opposite extremes.

How can someone be so simultaneously warm and nurturing and also so cold?

Sometimes the ability to execute is what’s required to be kind.
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Strange technological occurrences. Machines having atypical glitches.
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the thing about the song electric feel is that michael was the one who told me this was my song.

of the many myths, the one that strikes me is of the woman who can not be followed, but who becomes real only when she’s found.

speaking of electro-magnetism, i’m on my third computer at work. strange things happen and i’m shorting out the software, making it shut down randomly by itself, freezing up the os. it’s about par for course. maybe i just have really really bad luck with computers. but to me, it seems pretty obvious. i just have a stronger field.

She got the power in her hand
To shock you like you won’t believe.
Saw her in the amazon
With the voltage running through her skin
Standing there with nothing on
She gonna teach me how to swim

you coming  yet?

All along the eastern shore
Put your circuits in the sea
This is what the world is for
Making electricity
You can feel it in your mind
Oh you can do it all the time
Plug it in and change the world
You are my electric girl.

we’re gonna make a calm mindblowing storm.

Don’t freak people out and they won’t freak out. I think that’s a good rule of thumb.

I was seeing things so clearly today, but sometimes you sacrifice some unclears in order to be clear.

I can’t tell if I desocialized myself in the last two years to detach from humans out of safety, or if my natural propensity to detach has only been perpetuating. I feel like I isolated a needy part of myself so far to the point it gave up, and now it just accepts what it’s given. And I think it got really comfortable with what’s been given.

Had a dream last night I was on the 3rd street promenade in santa monica. Except this was my home, a place I went and claimed often. I saw that there was a Halloween party in one of the spaces–it was one of those urban spaces where you’re not sure if it’s an art gallery, a place of meeting or a home. I walked in and there were a bunch of people doing some kind of food and wine sampling, so it was kind of like a class/dinner party experience. It seemed like a weekly meeting that had  been going on for a while because the people were all friendly with each other, and it happened to be Halloween so a lot of them were wearing costumes. We sat down and ate and talked. A few of them seemed like powerful people, but they were so casually confident about their place in life. Near the end of the night, I caught myself talking to a couple. They were sitting across from each other, and the guy was one person over on my right. I’d been talking to them for a while when I realized, hey, it’s Bill and Hillary Clinton. Bill was especially cool. I wondered when it would be appropriate to ask if he smoked. I had a feeling he either did, or knew I could hook him up which is why he found me fascinating.

I was so shocked at the random experience I’d found myself in, that the next week, I invited my mother. Sure enough, with everyone out of make-up and costumes, it was Hillary and Bill, and a bunch of really wealthy and dignified people. We sat at this wooden table, discussing food and experiences, and Bill and I were so connected, but he was looking at me as much with fascination as with paternal pride, like I was something he liked but knew he shouldn’t touch, and he wondered what kind of boy it would take to make a girl like me happy.

Great boys choose great gemini’s. It’s why JFK loved Marilyn.

My cousin’s and I were talking about Edison at dinner as he played with a game on my phone. I asked them if they thought Edison and his brother would ever fight over a girl, and if so, who’d win. Ray thought Jonathan because “that kid’s mean. He’s an animal.” But Edison is devious. I thought about it. I think if Jonathan ever won, Edison would make sure he and the girl could never be together. My cousins wondered if he was old enough to calculate. I said, are you kidding me? That kid’s a super-villian in training.

The funny thing was, Edison had been deep in concentration playing the game, and it didn’t seem he even noticed we were talking. But right after I said he was a super-villian in training, he suddenly acknowledged he was listening, giggling and looking up, giving a sly look. Holy shit, Ray said. You totally called him out and he knows it. He totally knows he wants to be a super-villain.

This boy bought me a candle today. He chose lavender.

I was impressed.
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It’s like I’m at a wedding missing the people, but it still feels like a full experience. Lot of wedding talk today.
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man singing to an empty patio as though to a room full of people. my darlin’ you look wonderful tonight. sunset was perfect
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I don’t want to eat food that makes me hungry.
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I love driving by myself going anywhere and everywhere. The roads around me are so peaceful. I plan of doing this a lot on my free days. I love the way my engine growls.
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The bride threw a bouquet of granddaddy purple.
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I live in the coolest f-ing building in the area.
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