What if everything that I thought I was was wrong? And people came up and said, you’re dishonest, you steal, you lie. You can’t be trusted. And it wasn’t a matter of my denial, but because I had no idea. What if there was one day a break in my life, and I suddenly realized I’m a complete stranger. That I never knew myself at all.
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The things I need are not always good for me. So I focus on what I want.
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This is totally a test from the matrix. That’s why I know it’s significant, but I don’t believe it’s real.
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I’m gonna live through it. Just take today easy. Explore aimlessly.
One thing I seek in order to trust a person. Not to be stubborn at times when there is a chance you might be wrong.
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Neck sprain from on court collision. Finished the game then had to be helped out of the gym because of sudden onset of black spots in my vision, dizziness and my legs shaking. Misery.
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He looks worried sometimes. I’m kicking his ass in fantasy basketball. Sometimes I wonder if I irritate him, and that makes me decide I’m not really into him in THAT way. We have a ledge of candy between us–candy I left for him that he can take like a mouse because he never accepts what I offer, and candy he leaves for me because he doesn’t want other people’s offerings either. I gave it guardsmen.
We both left late one night at the same time and I was sleeveless because I’d left my sweater. It was dark outside, there was a little bit of moon, and it hadn’t looked like a rainy day, but as I was pulling out of the parking lot, it started to rain.
It made me think about how ghosts sometimes can have an entire life of their own when all they want is to meet themselves before they died.
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About Me:
experimental stream of consciousness writer who may or may not be a liar. sanest person you've ever met but i'll look you in the eyes like a computer eating magnets. what i don't know about you, i'll make up. and you'll still love me because you don't know where i went that moment you swore i disappeared. my moods chase the seasons and i hear it makes an interesting read. i like smelling good.