Venereal Day: The Morning After…
Happy Post Venereal Day everyone! Hope y’all had a great one. I had one of the better V-Days to date…even better than that one a few years ago when I went out with that drummer from that band…
Went to Cheesecake Factory with Brian, Roxie, Jake and the fam to celebrate Michael’s birthday since he wanted to do it in LA. We had an interesting porn debate at the bar. I’m hoping that Roxie can hook me up with this girl she knows who’s an ex porn actress. Okay, I don’t mean “hook up” in that way. I mean…I’ve been trying to get on a porn set to write a “trade” article. I don’t know why I just put quotations around the word, trade. It’s a serious article. Just a standard set visit article written objectively by a credible, established freelance writer who has published many industry interviews and set-visit features. I don’t know why people keep accusing me of just trying to talk my way onto a porn set. And watch people do it.
Anyway. We took a picture of me snorting sweet and low off the table through a rolled up $1. It looks pretty realistic so I’m not going to post it anywhere because I don’t want to have my character questioned (I mean, I’ll post pictures of myself with a loofah stuffed down a pair of hot pink spandex butt huggers while wearing a mesh tank and a flaming pink robe and cowboy hat, but I won’t post any sweet-and-low snorting photos). Jake and I met up with some people for drinks in the valley. There was a cool cover band featuring a woman who sounded like a man. It’s funny…I used to love Bon Jovi back in the day, but I don’t remember Living On a Prayer starting with the line, “Tommy has a 2-inch cock…”
I don’t remember a whole lot after that. It was a late night. We got up early this morning to head over to Big Bear so Jake and my mom could ski and I could fall asleep with my face pressed against a filthy food court table while my brother wrote a history of Mercedes M-Class Automobiles. Good times…
Actually a great, chill weekend. I’m not getting out of bed tomorrow!