on the first
of october i will mail
you what’s left of me after you
walked out six years to the day some
hair a few teeth the ashes of pictures long since deceased
and a whole lot of grievances
that don’t come cheap that i’ve
collected for you into something
familiar like a sixty pound
(leadhearted)
rubber band ball

January 15th, 2009 | Comments Off on

existence

(“right now is everything,” “later on will also be everything,” though “later on,” quantatively should equal more than everything if it were interpreted in a linear model. There are inconsistencies in our current model of the time/space relationship. How is it that one thing can move while the other stays the same and they still have a consistent relationship?)

January 15th, 2009 | Comments Off on

organizing old files on my computer and logging them. how weird it is that i have to research my own files because they seem so foreign to me, i’m not sure if i wrote them.

from 2/4/05. that has to be around the time i got my life straight.

Today’s theme seemed to be evolution. How we move forward not just as a group, but as individuals. I realized today that we don’t walk a straight line through life; every choice opens up potential futures, entire outlined stories suddenly willed into existence with the potential to be lived out. It’s our free will that conjures up those short walkways, willing them into existence, millions and millions attaching end to end to form the fluid grid that is, your life. But it’s destiny that pulls you through the walkway until you reach another choice with another potential set of futures that you can bring to life depending on how you choose to react and what you choose to do. So we just have to be conscious in each and every choice we make in our short time on earth, what it is we are really choosing and why we are choosing it.

The greatest disservice mass advertising ever did to us was convince us that everyone feels the same way in the light of day, but no one else ever has to face their shadows at night.

He looked down at her smiling, the same girl he had smiled at for months on end.

January 15th, 2009 | Comments Off on