Since when did “to protect and serve” become “to bully and humiliate?”
The only thing that can really make me lose it–my Achilles Heel–is the abuse of power by authority figures. Injustice and unfairness, as much as they terrify me, make me crazy with rage.
When a person grows older and faces all the things that frightened her as a child, she comes to realize that many fears are irrational, rooted in the limited perspective of a child pulling away from an existence defined by utter defenselessness and dependency. I had thought that I had confronted all my major fears and understood the realities/irrationalities of them, until my run-in this weekend with a nice, hick-town police officer who found the courage within himself to bully a defenseless woman on a dark road in the middle of nowhere in the middle of the night. Bravo, Mr. Police Man. Your friends must marvel at the size of your cojones.
I have one thing to say to him, before I write an official complaint letter mailed certified to every single person up his chain of command (and believe me, I DO have the time and tenacity):
If I ever see you again, take off your badge and let’s see what you’ve got. You think the law makes you a big man, when you’re a little runt hiding behind a ten cent piece of tin. Next time, we’ll do it again but just you and me–two regular people–standard playground shit. I’ve fucked up overgrown bullies with more significant lives than you and I’m not afraid to take the truth to where it needs to go to take away all your toys that make you feel big. I’ll tear down that flimsy big man facade and reveal you for the angry little boy you are who’s taking it out on the world because you’re pissed that everyone’s got it better than you. I may be afraid of the law, but I’m not afraid of any coward who hides behind it. Without your badge, the only way you’re gonna get me on the ground is by beating the crap out of me or shooting me, because there’s something inside me that will ALWAYS make me bigger than you.