i went to a micro-roaster and let the barista order for me. it was a rainy day, and he said i looked like a small americano, for here. the coffee was excellent. i sat outside at a table under the awning so i could watch the rain.
a man named dion invited himself to sit next to me, and over the next 3 hours, talked to me about his life–being in a gang as a kid, being thrown in jail for 3 months for a false accusation of robbing a transvestite prostitute in hollywood, a charge which was finally dropped when the case against him fell apart after the facts didn’t corroborate and the real criminals were arrested.
he tells me about his time in the navy, and how he sees that the political climate between things brewing in the middle east (Iran, Israel, etc), and the unreadiness of the US government will lead to a world war within the next 2 years. he talks about religious fanatics, how they ran our country for too long, and now we’ll all pay. he talks about how we are losing our freedoms as a society when you see all the homeless people on the street and how each generation is so used to it, that there is a growing rift of indifference to our fellow man.
he’s an intelligent man, but very focused on the negative.
i ask him what he feels his purpose is, to create awareness, or to create openings for solutions. he says to create awareness and solutions. i tell him that it is true, most people are sheep. many make more decisions out of fear or emotionality than out of rationality or knowing what is most likely to yield a best case scenario. it’s the human condition–we are emotional creatures who are not particularly comfortable with change. that it is important for people in the world to serve in creating awareness, but he has to be careful of learned helplessness.
sun tzu in the art of war said to always leave your opponents a golden bridge to retreat across, because desperate men will fight the hardest. the same, you can make people aware of negative, realistic problems in our society, but you have to give them room to believe in a potential to work for a solution, no matter how bleak.
you have to be always conscious of your purpose of communication–he had complained of the bush administration’s tactics to use fear to manipulative conservative voters. but the way he had been communicating, was also using fear. as he told me of the alarming factors in the political landscape that points to war and the decline of the united states, i pointed out factors that would need to be addressed and ways the social climate was becoming more aware; that there were changes–that sometimes, society takes a step back before taking two steps forward in evolution. but he would go back to the doomsday scenario rather than discuss these. most people, when you trigger a fear reaction in them for the sake of triggering a fear reaction, they feel cornered and will scratch at anything to not be in that corner, even if that includes rejecting the speaker and what has been spoken, throwing out the baby with the bathwater. there are some serious problems that many people are not aware of and these problems will inherently be uncomfortable to face, but if you communicate it to people in a way that these problems need to be solved, even if the problem is complex and the solution is not immediately evident, it at least opens a potential for positivity in the face of unwanted realistic facts. to make them feel that the negative is inevitable, really excludes any positive outcome of the interaction.
i get it. i am focused on making people aware of the problems. but once i make people aware, i need to push them towards an active moment, he said.
i was impressed.
that’s a great way to put it, i said. i couldn’t have put it in any better way.
from that point the way he spoke changed. he told me he likes to “fuck with” people who are closed-minded and who are ignorant, but he sees that with people who are more open-minded or willing, he could get more by getting them onboard to at least realizing that our country has problems, but also by thinking about how each person, even if just by being more conscious, can contribute to a solution.
it’s about the bottom line, i said. it’s steps. you’re very good about the analysis. you have an idea of an outcome that collectively we don’t want. so you’re motivated to create awareness of the problem because it’s true–most people are unaware of what’s going on politically/socially because we have untrustworthy media and it’s hard to put together what’s going on. but remember, once people are aware, then what? what do you want? always know your purpose a few steps ahead, and everything else falls into place. if you ultimately want us to not give up complete control to our government which would infringe on our freedom, then this would require citizens to be more aware of our government, to start change and reform from the bottom up. the first step is awareness, and the second step is making people believe that they have the power, at the very least, by living more consciously, to actively create positive change. and then you are passing your intentions positively forward. if your bottom line is you want to see positive changes, don’t manipulate negative emotions. let your passion for positive action light a fire under people. you won’t awaken everyone, many won’t even be able to hear you out of fear, but those who do, will pass it forward. The seeds of change take place one conversation at a time, one connection at a time, and never, ever underestimate the powerful alignment of words and intention.